As always, your questions and comments crack me up, some perplex me (as you’ll read) and in this blog I present the best of the one-off questions and comments.
1. “What is something about you people would be surprised by?” No name provided.
Ugh. And the truth comes out.
Years of my youth were dedicated to choir. Yes. I spent years in the school choir and even participated in local and state competitions. Not only am I a bonafide book nerd, I was a choir geek, and also theater geek, while I’m sitting here and confessing. I was a theater tech for several years. I did not act, no, no. Acting might have leveled up my cool points. No, I was the schmuck that was all into the technical side of theater, getting the lighting and sound board just right. I don’t know how much more nerd you can get other than admitting to DND gaming, which I don’t. I have my limits for god’s sake.
I loved my years in choir, though. Choir was my first experience in self-expression and I always looked to music to help me better understand myself and the world in which I lived.
2. “How often do you eat?” Samantha P. (a regular), Wisconsin
Samantha! What’s up girl? Hope you’re well!
The short answer: CONSTANTLY. If you think of me at all, just know regardless of the date, time, or circumstance, I am hungry. I try to consume protein dense and healthy fat dense foods to curb the worst of it. Bear in mind, I do have calorie boundaries and my energy/metabolism is unique to me.
On a side note, I did eschew all protein powders (you asked me about that at some point) and I do not advocate protein bars or “meal replacement” bars. I’ve yet to find a protein bar that didn’t ultimately add up to garbage in the ingredients.
Clean protein powder is achievable but the cost is unbelievable. I dropped a scoop of protein powder about 7 months ago and realized I dropped about $10 worth of powder. It’s easy to fall into the performance and enhancement pitfalls but ultimately I found my personal use of protein powders to be financially irresponsible. I don’t need it. I went back to precooked turkey and chicken portions as snacks and noticed no difference in my gym performance or muscle maintenance. The only noticeable difference was a positive in that my stomach felt less strained. It makes me question the human digestive’s system ability to break down high doses of protein. Is it even necessary? Or helpful in such high quantities?
Hope that was helpful.
3. “Do you have any pets?”
I love all animals and I grew up with a lot of them (cats, dogs, fish, gerbils, birds). I find pets enrich our lives and is a natural way to teach children the life cycle.
When it came time to bring a pet into our home, I took my daughter to an adoption day at a local pet store. She thought the puppies were cute but gravitated towards cats the most. So naturally, we adopted a guinea pig.
I know, it makes perfect sense, lol. Let me tell you what happened.
I saw the guinea pigs and it was a full litter. Of the whole litter, there was one little guy completely isolated by the others. Animals often socially isolate their weaker mates or the “runts.” He was shivering and so small compared to the other guineas my heart instantly broke. I apologized to my daughter and explained that we would be leaving with a guinea pig that day. I explained that it was our job to love him, feed him, and take care of him.
Once my instinct to feed something, or someone, kicks in, well that’s pretty much love for me. I couldn’t walk away from that little guy.
To her credit, my daughter was cool with it and not at all disappointed like I thought she’d be. Like me, she’s partial to those creatures that seem hurt or abandoned (somehow she befriended the local neighborhood cat, he comes around for petting and only from my daughter).
My guinea pig’s name is Pip. He’s dumb as bricks but he’s sweet and loves a cuddle. Pip has reached his adult weight but will always be small compared to other piggies his age. Pip’s health isn’t the best. He has constant respiratory issues…I imagine he will not be the longest living guinea pig but Pip will have a comfortable life with us if nothing else. We love him to pieces.
4. “Your jaw looks like it could cut butter.” Terry
Terry, I admit your comment has perplexed me. I’ve even run your comment by friends. I don’t know what it means, neither do my friends. I’ve Googled your sentence to see if there was some reference I was missing and am none the wiser.
So, thanks? I guess?
5. “Has anyone ever told you you look like Christie Brinkley from the 80s?” Dane, Texas
Yes. Several times. Although you’re the first person to ask me in writing.
I personally don’t see it but there you are. As I’ve noted, my strengths do not lie in recognizing visual characteristics. I’ve also gotten compared to Pamela Anderson from the the early 90s (if I don’t see Christie Brinkley, I definitely don’t see Pamela Anderson) but mostly I get the Christie Brinkley comment.
Also, my name has been confused with the Canadian actor, Christina Schmidt. I am not that lady. Other than vlogs I have no upcoming film projects. Sorry guys.
6. “On a scale of the 80s where are you: Eurythmics or Yazoo?” Jess, California
Jess, I freakin’ love this question! Nearly did a spit take when I read it over email. It’s cute, it’s original and cleverly open-ended.
On a scale of the 80s I fall into Tangerine Dream.
First, if you’re asking ‘who is Tangerine Dream,’ my friend you need to acquaint yourself with early synth pop (bear in mind, Tangerine Dream dabbled in everything). This, however, is where we fall into a technical argument. Tangerine Dream formed in the early 70s, some say late 68′-69′ (they changed members often and marked different sound periods). Despite their dates as a cohesive group, I would include their existence on the 80s scale as I believe some of their best work in synth (originally styled electric pop) was developed over a period critical to 80s soundtracks.
All due respect to the great Eurythmics for whom I adore, and Yazoo was…Yazoo, but I observe your 80s question as stemming from a synth sound (or so I’m assuming) and I would advise you take a stroll with Tangerine Dream, a group that not only predated synth before being called as such, they kept up in electric pop too, most notably in the 80s (I believe) when the sound of synth became much more mainstream, and so their work had more time to develop than most.
7. “What’s sex with you like?” Bradley, Missouri ***
Well, Bradley, I’m guessing I’m not the only one trying to pass the time in quarantine. You’re either bored, or maybe you thought you were being original (you weren’t) or that you could shock/embarrass me (you can’t, you have no idea what it takes to embarrass a woman who writes erotica) but regardless of your reasons, Bradley, I am going to answer your question because it actually made me think, ‘what is sex with me like?’
At first, an image of King Leonidas popped into my mind as he loudly declared, “THIS. IS. SPARTA!” before kicking the messenger into the well. This mental image switched to my boldly declaring, “THIS. IS. CHRISTINA!” before mounting my partner into submission. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
I don’t care who you are. I don’t care where you’re from. THAT’S FUNNY. If you can’t laugh at that, I don’t know what to tell you.
But seriously – or as seriously as I can take your question, Bradley – I think, no, scratch that, I KNOW, sex with me is like a Stevie Nicks album cover: feminine, mysterious, a little witchy and silk. Glorious silky, silk.
*** I’d like to note that I see the humor in Bradley’s question but I also see the question as a good example of a line. Let’s take care not to cross it. ***
Take care of yourselves out there.
And, Writers Lift Wednesday tomorrow!